The role of kids in Filipino families

Carlos Yulo’s rise to fame as a double medalist at the Olympics, and the ensuing social media kerfuffle involving his family, struck a sensitive chord in the Filipino collective consciousness. It opened a pandora’s box of generational trauma that our society is still grappling with.

In my 15 years of leading Roots of Health, a reproductive health nongovernment organization in Palawan, one issue has stood out vividly: the role of children in Filipino families, particularly in lower-income households. Historically, it was not uncommon to see couples with 10 or more children in poor communities. This was due to a lack of access to family planning resources and a deep-rooted cultural belief that having more children increased the chances that at least one would “make it big” and lift the family out of poverty. This mindset served as a form of social security in a society with minimal safety nets. Instead of limiting the number of children to what they could afford, families often viewed having many children as a hedge against economic insecurity.

This belief highlights a significant aspect of Filipino family dynamics: Children are often seen as investments. The hope is that one successful child can break the cycle of poverty and, in turn, support the entire family. This expectation places immense pressure on children to succeed and provide for their parents and siblings.

A major part of this investment involves funding children’s education. The Philippines mirrors other developing countries in the way it chooses children to send to school. Worldwide, boys were historically more educated than girls, but recent World Bank data shows that girls are now educated at higher levels than ever before. In some cultures, girls are educated and cared for in the hope that they will bring in dowries. In the Philippines, when a poor family can only afford to send one child to school, it is often the girl who gets this opportunity. This preference can be attributed to the perception that girls are more diligent in their studies. It also reflects the cultural expectation that girls will continue to live close to or with their parents, even after marriage, providing ongoing support. Boys, on the other hand, are typically expected to build their own families, which reduces their perceived long-term value and obligation to their family of origin. However, Philippine Statistics Authority data reveals that among 1.48 million children aged 5 to 17 involved in child labor in 2022, 66.2 percent were boys and 33.8 percent were girls. This reveals that male children feel pressure much earlier and in a different way than female children.

The idea that children are supposed to be investments has been passed down through generations, but it should no longer hold true in modern society—that is if financial structures are equitable and government social protection programs like universal health care, public education, social security, and senior citizen benefits, among others, are in place and functioning effectively.

While we hope that the government will increase capacity and reduce corruption to deliver these social protection services, potential shifts could also occur if families realize the benefits of planning their families according to their current capacities and gain better access to sexual and reproductive health resources.

Access to free, comprehensive, and nonjudgmental reproductive health counseling and contraceptive services must become the norm in every barangay, even and especially for teen mothers. As perspectives evolve within families and the reliance for a “lucky breakout star” might diminish, services must be available to meet family planning needs. These simultaneous developments could lead to more equitable and sustainable family structures, where each child is valued for who they are and given appropriate attention and care. At Roots of Health, we believe that all babies should be wanted and planned. This core belief has driven our efforts to provide Filipino families with free education and services they need to make informed decisions about their reproductive health. Over the past 15 years, we have witnessed the transformative power of family planning in fostering healthier, more sustainable family units.

By helping families control their fertility according to the number of children they can sustain and plan for, we contribute to breaking the cycle of poverty and reducing the pressure on children to serve as financial saviors. Our work empowers parents to provide better opportunities for their children, ensuring that each child is valued and nurtured, rather than seen as an economic safety net.

The role of children in Filipino families is a complex interplay of cultural beliefs, socioeconomic realities, and access to family planning. By addressing these factors, we can promote healthier, more equitable family dynamics, and improve the overall well-being of Filipino families.

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Amina Evangelista Swanepoel is executive director of Roots of Health which provides free reproductive health services and education for women and young people in Palawan.