The Fifth Commandment

#Akonaman

“’Nay, ’Tay pili na po kayo.” These quietly spoken words delivered in a very tender but firm voice made me look up from my grocery cart. It had come from a young man in his early 20s who must have recently joined the workforce. Flanked by his two elderly parents, that scene witnessed from decades back, when recalled, remains to be very clear, and vivid, and manages without fail, to forever touch something deep within. I remember having to quickly run from the aisle, lest they caught me getting more than misty.

#Blowout

“Lola, blow out namin ito.” A boy proudly held up a fistful of bills, to show his grandmother that they had saved enough to treat her to a meal. Together with his brother, they had broken open their piggy bank to execute the perfect plan. After surprising Lola at the door of their home with a birthday card that they had made by hand, the younger of the two proudly announced that they knew of the perfect place to celebrate and hurriedly dragged her to a local fast-food chain. Fashionable in a bright blue dress with matching perfectly coiffed hair, Lola visibly struggled to retain her poise upon seeing her boys busy serving her and eventually succumbed to a near meltdown. The scene ended with Lola rewarding both with a tight hug to express her appreciation. While this was a TV commercial crafted to sell a product, it was not an impossibility that it could have been based on a true story. Regardless of how it had come about, it left an imprint that was to be carefully preserved in one’s memory bank.

#Sasakyan

The family was asked to converge in a restaurant one Sunday morning. The father had been recently diagnosed with terminal cancer and the four siblings wanted to give him a more comfortable ride. After having decided on what to eat, a daughter asked them to look out the window at an SUV that was parked near the entrance. Someone had attached a sign on it that could not be read from where they sat. Giving her extra points for her acting and persuasive abilities, she engaged them in a discussion that ended with a broad hint that someone was about to get a big surprise and brought them out to take a closer look. Their parents had always been unassuming individuals, so it took quite some time before it registered that the vehicle was intended for them. Brisk to recover from the shock, what followed was a meaningful and mutual exchange of how grateful and blessed they were as a family. Their father had always been that constant figure, uncontestably the most reliable person who would drive them anywhere they wanted or needed to go. The youngest, in a succeeding conversation, shared a one-liner that the others had missed out on earlier that morning. Apparently almost to himself, spoken in an undertone, he had asked, “Baka hindi ko na kakayanin mag-drive?”

Love and respect for parents and elders. These were central to all of the three stories. While mostly expressed through gifts that were of the tangible kind, one can easily identify the invisible but potent drivers that fuel the countless reasons behind the giving.

His Fifth Commandment. Honor thy Father and thy Mother. An octogenarian friend shared that being obedient, showing sensitivity to their needs, and having an honest consideration of their feelings are just some of the ways that one can show respect. Even saying the word “opo,” which is unique to us as a people but often forgotten, is in itself a verbal manifestation. To honor means to give due respect either through words spoken or actions taken. In its highest form, it is living a life guided by what is moral and just. A large part of who we are not only is reflective of the environment wherein we were raised but more importantly of the kind of parents that we have and of the values instilled. To be able to mirror the best that you see in them is to give more meaning to the Fifth.

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