Infighting

The story is told about a husband and wife who had a fight. The wife called up her mother and said: “I am coming home to live with you.” The mother replied: “No, darling. He must pay for his mistake. I am coming over to live with you two!”

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In today’s Gospel (Lk. 10, 38-42), we hear of the “infighting” of the two sisters, Martha and Mary. Both of them loved and served the Lord, but in different ways. Martha served the Lord with hospitality, while Mary listened to the Lord with love and simplicity. Who of the two was right? Who of the two deserved the Lord’s love more? Wrong questions. They both loved and served the Lord in their own way. So, there should be no contest, no comparison, no infighting for us who claim to serve and love the Lord, too.

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We must go beyond our “better-than-thou” attitude. Also, we must go beyond our “holier-than-thou” attitude. Serving God and loving God are not about us, but about Him! May God give us the grace of humility and acceptance, as well as basic respect for one another. To God, not to us, be the glory.

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I wish that we who claim to serve and love the Lord could share less about our functions or titles and more about our journey and our moments when we encountered the Lord, be it in our work or in prayer. We are not mere functionaries or mercenaries. We are disciples with a Master; we are missionaries.

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Let us stress more our commonalities rather than our differences. Let us focus, not on the walls that divide us, but, more so, on the bridges that connect us in our journey to God’s heart. Please remember that our journey to God’s heart must grow from “small circle, small circle, towards big circle, big circle!”

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Are you a Martha or a Mary? Marthas are active, hardworking, well-meaning disciples. But the problem with many Marthas among us is that they can become “Martaray”—proud disciples who focus more on their usefulness, and tend to forget their dependence on and need for God. Careful, careful! The truth is that God often works, not so much because of us, as in spite of us.

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At this point in my life, I am discovering more and more the Mary in each one of us—i.e., a humble, listening, quiet, hidden and “useless” disciple of our Lord. I admire fellow disciples who have learned to let go and to let God, and who have realized that the call is all about God’s call, not our call; His glory, not our glory; and His mercy, not our achievements. May Mama Mary give us the grace to be humble, obedient, simple and free of vain glory.

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If we get upset, anxious, or worried about many things, like Martha, well, that is because we are focused on things, or on people, and not so much on the Lord. But if we become like Mary, and spend time to sit at His feet and listen to Him, a lot of our concerns about things and people become secondary. Please don’t be so focused on your career, finances, achievements, popularity, beauty, or image, so as to forget your most important journey—your journey to God’s heart, and your final destination, heaven.

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Sharing with you this beautiful piece of poetry, titled “For Mary,” from the book “Magnificat”: “My sister Mary, always the contemplative, has found a permanent place in the Lord’s house. She sits at the feet of Jesus all day, knowing Him full well, and I am a restless Martha left to this troubled world. For now this is my part. She sees Him face to face, I, but a reflection dim—yet both of us are fully known by Him.” (Rita Simmonds)

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To be busy and useful for the Lord (Martha) is good, but to be still and “useless” for the Lord (Mary) is “the better part.” Let us learn to acknowledge and respect this within us, between and among us, in our journey to God’s heart.

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We all will face our God someday. I hope we will not face Him with shame or regret that we did not take time to really be with Him, and really listen to Him in prayer, because we were too busy serving Him and His people, or that we were focused on “more important things” that had to be done and thus set aside our prayer time, or that we had to be tough and thus belittled matters of the heart. Prayer, humility, kindness and joy are important marks of a disciple with a Master.

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“Pray, hope, and don’t worry. Worry is useless. God is merciful and will hear our prayer.” These are words of comfort and consolation from St. Padre Pio.

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Think about this: “A busy life makes prayer hard, but prayer makes a busy life easier.”

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A moment with the Lord:

Lord, please remove whatever infighting is within, between and among us who claim to love and serve You. Amen.