True loving

The story is told about a man who hurriedly put a P10 coin in the collection basket during Mass. Someone behind him tapped him on his shoulder and handed him a P1,000 bill, which he also put in the basket. As he was musing on the generosity of the person behind him, and feeling convicted by it, there was another tap on his shoulder and then a whisper: “That P1,000 bill fell from your pocket.”

* * *

In today’s gospel (Jn. 15, 9-17), Jesus’ unconditional and tremendous love convicts us all. How little and how shallow is our loving! He has chosen to love us no matter what, and He calls us His friends, not His slaves. We still have a long, long way to go on the road of love. We must face this realization and say: “Thank You, Lord!” and “Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner.” Let no one of us be self-righteous and proud.

* * *

“This I command you: Love one another.” This is Jesus’ farewell wish for and command to all of us. If we love one another, we make Him happy. And we make ourselves happy, too. It is more for our own good if we remain in His love. In fact, if we follow His commandment of love, He promised that His joy will be in us, and our joy will be complete.

* * *

Why is there no real joy in our lives? Perhaps we do not love enough, or we do not love truly. What may seem as loving and sacrificing may just be selfishness and self-satisfaction.

* * *

“Remain in My love.” This is all we need to listen to as we go through the ups and downs, twists and turns in our journey through life. As long as we remain in His love, we will be able to endure any problem, pain, sickness, persecution, failure, or disappointment. We will still have that peace which the world cannot give or take away. It is His love that gives us strength, courage, meaning and inspiration to go on. Let nothing, and no one, disturb or separate us from His love.

* * *

Let us not forget that we are loved, we are chosen, we are appointed to go and bear fruit that will remain. God’s love should lead us to mission. Our gifts, our blessings, are meant to be shared.

* * *

Please check your kind of loving. True love is not conditional (I love you if…). True love is not calculated (I love you three times a day). True love is not manipulative (I love you, but…). True love is not with an agenda (I love you in order that…). Finally, true love is not threatening (Love me, or else…). Yes, we still have so much to learn about love.

* * *

Congratulations to couples, brothers and sisters, friends, or colleagues who have stayed on and held on to each other in spite of trials and difficulties. Congratulations for choosing love and sacrifice in your relationship. How far easier it is to give up than to hold on, to fight rather than to heal, to be bitter than to be sweet. In the end, loving is a choice you make, no matter what.

* * *

“I would rather go on living with your lies and alibis than to go on living without you by my side.” This is a choice that Charito made concerning her husband Tony early on, and throughout their 50 years of married life. Wow! How many people can make that choice? Foolish as it may seem, it worked, and it kept them together all these years.

* * *

Marriage—or love, for that matter—is not a 50/50 proposition. For marriage or any relationship to last, there must be a dynamic give and take. When one is giving only 20 percent, the other must give his/her 80 percent. Beyond justice is love and sacrifice.

* * *

The month of May is the month of Mama Mary, our heavenly Mother. Let us continue to seek refuge in her, and let her lead us, ever gently, closer to her Son. Mama Mary, bless our motherland and the whole world with peace.

* * *

Happy Mothers’ Day! As we remember and pray for our mother, let us also honor her by imbibing her virtues, and passing these on to those who will come after us. It is our mother who has taught us by her words and deeds what true loving is. God bless and reward all mothers for their good and generous hearts!

* * *

On a personal note, I would like my Mama Conching’s prayerfulness, cheerfulness, humility and kindness to remain in me and live on. Mama was also self-effacing, and self-sacrificing. More than that, she was a very loving person. Yes, a mother’s love is never gone.

* * *

Thoughts to ponder: “You count the hours you could have spent with your mother, it’s a lifetime in itself” (Mitch Albom, “For One More Day”).

“Everything that God allows to come our way is always with a purpose; He uses even errors and hurts to mold us into better persons of faith, humility and courage.”

* * *

A moment with the Lord:

Lord, teach us to love, to truly love. Amen.