He did not even get down on one knee while holding the small box and saying those two words, “Marry me?”
My wedding proposal did not include a flash mob, a choreographed entourage, rolling cameras, balloons, flowers, or fireworks. We were not even having a candlelit dinner in a fancy restaurant. We were just in my house sitting side by side after eating the dinner I had cooked. He took the velvety blue box out of his pocket, opened it, pulled out a diamond ring, and popped the question.
He did not even get down on one knee. There were no sweet nothings, the sort said by leading men in all those romantic movies.
With the rising trend in larger-than-life wedding proposals that send netizens abuzz, mine is hardly remarkable. The usual formula of bended knee + ring + “Marry me?” that charmed the ladies years ago has now disappointed many prospective brides who expect a proposal worthy to be posted on YouTube.
Who would not be enthralled by those over-the-top wedding proposals trending on the Internet? I am one of the avid viewers of those will-you-marry-me moments, and they never fail to make me shudder with delight, or shed a tear or two. I admire those men who think of creative ways to ask for the hand of the woman with whom they want to spend the rest of their life—ways that could have originated in man’s nature of doing astounding things to win a bride.
Well, he did not even get down on one knee. Nevertheless, my wedding proposal was one of the most memorable moments of my life, a distinctive illustration of my fiancé’s personality—uncomplicated, but warm and intimate.
And, like my relationship with my fiancé, private. Our relationship is only about us and our respective families. We are not used to displaying our affection for each other publicly. He is not the type of guy who will post sweet messages on my Facebook wall or post our sweet photos on his Facebook wall. But he will not fail to tenderly affirm that he loves me.
My wedding proposal did not take place in front of a thousand people. My fiancé would be hesitant and nervous to be in front of a crowd, but he was confident enough when he faced my family to ask for my hand in marriage during the “pamanhikan.”
There was nothing splashy, nothing dramatic, in that moment. My fiancé is not the type of man who will do something extraordinary for me to be tickled pink. He does not lavish me with gifts and flowers, but he generously gives me his time and his service. He routinely washes the dishes after every meal, takes the garbage out, and runs my errands without applause from the crowd, camera flashes, and a video recorder.
He would stay awake all night during those years when we were in a long-distance relationship, to chat with me. He also doesn’t fail to get up early to walk me to the bus stop every morning, just to see that I am safely on my way to the office.
I did not have an elaborate wedding proposal. But it is focused on its purpose: We will commit to a bond that will endure until death, and we will build a stable environment to rear our future children.
He did not even get down on one knee. But I can guarantee that he knows how to bend his two knees to pray for our relationship.
I like it that way—uncomplicated, just the two of us in our most decisive moment.
Reya Bato, 29, works in a travel and shipping agency in Dubai. She says she is getting married this year.