Superheroes

Study hard, get yourself a job, and finance your siblings’ education. These and many more are the responsibilities that a number of sons and daughters of today often need to face. These responsibilities are unwritten but instinctively understood and agreed upon.

Being born and raised in a country where the level of poverty is quite overwhelming, I have witnessed such a system prevailing in many Filipino families. In most cases the eldest child is the one who takes up the burdens that the parents, being out of means, cannot act upon. By choice or as dictated by the situation, the eldest child submits to being the secondary, if not the primary, provider for the family.

Instantly, I fit right in. I am one of those young and spirited fellows who, by any and all means, would lend a hand to his family beset by scarcity. I am one of the many who would deprive his/her own self of the frills of life and just make do with the so-called “necessities” in order to earn and save. I am one of those who see sacrifice as an outlet to be hoisted up from dearth. Yes, definitely, I am one of them—the breadwinners.

I, like many others, come from an ordinary family that makes just enough for basic needs, and that occasionally struggles to meet what’s deemed to be superior to the daily nitty-gritty, like hospitalization and education expenses. However, unlike other youths my age, I don’t feel there’s a need for lamentation just because I was born in a family not particularly endowed, or just because my father’s income is insufficient to put me through college, or just because I can’t take being labeled a breadwinner as it is not as classy as it sounds, or just because I am the one undertaking the supposed obligations of parents.

No. I am okay with my role even if its repercussions can mean being deprived of the things a young man like myself should supposedly be enjoying. I am okay with it if, in exchange, it means freeing my family from the bondage of poverty.

When I fixed my gaze on how my father went about his daily toil, leaving our house before the sun rose and returning at dusk dead tired, I (in an instant) felt compelled to take part in what is called the price of greatness: responsibility.

My sense of responsibility is what urged me to study hard back in college. It is what urged me to stay away from not-so-good friends, or those who would pull me away from my goals. It is what urged me to be frugal, even if it meant being divested of simple pleasures.

It was out of responsibility, too, that I got my diploma, a passport to a better job. And still, it was out of responsibility that I felt obliged to work, as hard as I can, because by working hard I can compensate the love (coming from all sorts of sacrifices) that my parents bestowed on me.

God, who is so good, blessed me with a means of support: a job. I was hired by a photo-voltaic company in Laguna and from there I was able to start from scratch. I had (by all means) tried to trim my expenses so I could send the excess money home. My job isn’t the kind of job you might think, one that requires sitting at a desk or taking calls from customers. Mine is not a high-paying job. I earn my salary by lifting, carrying and manually fixing stuff. It is physically tiring, really.

For six years I have thrived like this, constantly mindful of and providing for my family’s needs. Sometimes I have to resort to borrowing money from other people so family members wouldn’t have to make do without coffee and sugar on the table, or I stretch my remaining funds so they can pay their electricity bill while I ponder on how to pay my own, or I juggle overtime work so my brother does not have to suffer humiliation by depending on a promissory note. But these and many other things are the consequences that beset the resilient soul behind a breadwinner.

It is said that being a breadwinner is to be selfless: You have to think of the welfare of your family first, and never mind that you have your own needs. Yes, you read me right. We also have needs, but because it is our choice—or rather destiny—to stand where we are now, it seems that we have lost the right to grumble. However, there are stubborn moments when I catch myself yearning for what others have or experience, especially when I glance over photos of my friends on Facebook, sitting so relaxed, sipping that big-name coffee that costs a lot (if I will compute its price, it can mean… three kilos of rice). Darn this fate, I’d think, I can’t waste my money on that. Sarcastic—that’s how I am, because at the back of my mind is the longing to taste that coffee in time (when the life-will-get-better pursuit is over, perhaps).

Also, I sometimes envy those people who are not obliged to allocate a fraction, or even the better part, of their salary to their family because it means financial freedom for them; it means they can enjoy the benefits of traveling and exploring the world, of buying things they want, and most of all, of enjoying the many perks that having money brings.

Still, for young breadwinners like me who shoulder portions of the earth, all these are mere caprice, only suitable for fancy or for dreaming about. For what matters to us is the reality that not all people are blessed, that some were born with responsibilities, just like heroes.

Breadwinners are more than just heroes: They are superheroes.

John Tugano, 25, of San Vicente, San Pedro, Laguna, works as an operations technician at Sunpower Philippines and maintains a blog at https://blitheanduntroubledlife.wordpress.com.