19 and wiser

“Tell me about yourself that’s not written here on your resumé.”

“Anything?”

“Yes, anything. Like your most significant past. Your life. I want to set aside the academe for a while.”

I was caught off-guard in the interview for my first job. I expected questions like “Why should I hire you?” or “What can you do that makes you different from other applicants?” And for the first time, I didn’t want to impress anyone; I just wanted to answer the question.

My life revolves around three guiding principles. It all started when I was a high school freshman and I got a bad grade in elementary algebra in the fourth grading period. I was so outraged that I went to the faculty room and demanded an explanation from my teacher. I don’t like math but I don’t hate it either, not to the point that I’d receive a horrible mark, disqualifying me from the honor roll for the rest of my high school life.

My teacher was a fine man. He ignored my disrespectful tone and handed me my exam paper. And I was surprised to see that I didn’t even deserve the grade of 79. I had scored only 18 out of 50 questions! If my teacher were inconsiderate, he would have given me a failing mark. I did not deserve to be in the top 10.

That’s my first principle: I will not get what I want because I will get what I deserve.

After the devastating incident, I cried. I was ashamed of myself. How would my parents react? How would my classmates see me? That I won’t earn my slot in the university because I couldn’t even find “X”?

So my second principle goes: You can’t have it all.

My 79 in elementary algebra was nothing compared to my 98 in Filipino, 96 in English, and 95 in science and technology. Numbers are my weakness, my imperfection, just like Achilles’ heel. No one is invulnerable. Maybe I’m not good in trinomials, but I’m capable of handling any other field. I just have to accept and be happy with what I’ve got because they are the things I need most.

My third principle: a reality check. I didn’t get the job as a pharmacist in a government hospital. Just when the chief pharmacist was to hire me, another board passer like myself who’s related to someone in the administration division turned up. I realized that sometimes, it’s not what you know but who you know.

I had high hopes of getting that job, but you really can’t tell what will happen. They say that life is a box of chocolates—bitter chocolates. Are knowledge and personality enough, or is it necessary to have someone push your luck?

I’m wiser now. Because of my guiding principles, I feel that I’m lucky to see the other facets of life. I got a better job. I’m 19 and ready to open another box of chocolates.

Mer-va F. Crisostomo is a fresh pharmacy graduate of Our Lady of Fatima University.