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Being single

So you’re single. You can be in a relationship any time you want to, but you choose not to. You’ve been in a serious relationship before, but it didn’t work out. That’s life. Take your time. No need to rush.

You reflect: What went wrong? What lesson could you learn? What do you really want? For the first time in your life, you value your heart. You realize that every time you let someone into your life, you’re giving away a part of yourself. And a piece of yourself is way too valuable to just give away to someone you barely know, even if that someone is insanely hot.

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All your hormones and “soulja boys” are in mutiny, screaming in unison: “We want to break free!” Or something to that effect. Every fiber of your being wants to indulge—in a meaningless kiss, in phony intimacy, in an easy relationship that empties you the more you stay in it. But now you know better.

You long for something genuine, something you won’t be ashamed of. Hell, yes, something about which you can say: “I made the right choice.”

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You want to understand yourself. You look at the man in the mirror, yet he is a stranger to you. For the longest time, you’ve been chasing after the wind. Moving from one relationship to another, not really sure what you’re after, or even who you are. All the noises of the world have drowned your inner voice.

You embark on a journey of self-discovery. The silence of having no one to talk to is deafening, but you begin to hear your own small voice.

You get comfortable with being you—no mask, no sugarcoat. You discover that you’re cool, even if others think otherwise. You don’t give a damn now about what people say.

You travel. You see the world for what it really is—imperfect yet beautiful. You get to know other people, and immerse in their culture. You widen your horizon, and you appreciate the beauty in diversity.

You go to the gym, learn a new sport. You run like you’re being chased by angry dogs. You eat healthy food, sleep like there’s no tomorrow, dream like the world is all yours. You work hard, party harder.

And then, you begin to love yourself. You’re grateful that you’re single.

You realize that singleness is actually bliss.

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Gary C. Mondejar, 24, is a reservoir engineer at Energy Development Corp.

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