Care to give

Bigyan mo na lang ng sampung piso ’yan.” The supermarket was about to close and two men who were busy fixing the grocery shelves were looking indulgently at an unkempt boy by the freezer looking longingly at pints of ice cream. Disheveled and obviously undernourished, his P10 coin apparently had fallen into the crack between the two freezers and there was no way to retrieve it. A woman witnessing the scene went to his side and asked what he wanted. She left her shopping cart momentarily, proceeded to the cashier to pay, and asked the bagger to look for a spoon to give to the boy. “Anong sasabihin mo kay Kuya, tinulungan ka maghanap ng kutsara?” He replied as if in a trance and almost in a whisper, ”Maraming salamat po.” The woman requested that he say it again, but this time, to look at Kuya while doing so.

The VIP concert tickets were given for free by a sibling, as a prescription ordered that we take a break from our routine. It had been such an emotionally charged week and a change of scenery would do wonders. “Think about this, showing up would be your personal way of showing support for our Filipino artists.” An hour into the program, we saw a mom and a daughter inching their way to their assigned seats. The mother was shuffling and robot-like in gait, Parkinson’s disease most likely, and the way the daughter was gently assisting her and making sure that her mother was comfortably seated caught my attention and held it. Midway she assisted her to stand up, put her arm tenderly on her mother’s shoulders and together they swayed to the tune which must have been mom’s favorite.

The other week, a friend recounted how humbled she was to have been someone’s answered prayer. She had come from the doctor’s clinic to get an opinion for a relative’s condition and was feeling emotionally drained but curiously light from her interaction with people she met while awaiting her turn.

One was an elderly woman who had been diagnosed with a malignancy, another one was waiting for results and a possible operation, and a third one had come to check if her condition was stable. Everyone spoke about their fear of the medical verdict, which was understandable. For her, what weighed heavily were the other concerns that surfaced. Most were financial in nature but interspersed in the sharing of stories was the longing for some form of care from their children, siblings, or relatives. Two had come on their own, while the other was accompanied by a friend from her religious group. Through it all, she listened. Her reward? Sincere words of thanks and looks that conveyed deep appreciation.

Happy to have been of help, she made her way down to the parking lot to wait for her driver. It was fortunate that she had messaged him prior to her phone battery being used up and she had enough time to spare. Unused to standing still, she decided to go to the chapel and while praying heard someone moaning. It was coming from a child whose face was half-covered by a cloth, awkwardly positioned in a wheelchair, and accompanied by his mother who was clearly grief-stricken but trying to hold it together. She made her way to them and saw the reason for the facial covering, the boy had a big mass on his left eye.

The mother shared that he had been operated years before but the tumor had recurred. Careful not to act and say anything that would make them feel that she pitied their situation, she turned to the boy to ask if he was in pain and told him to pray a little harder. To this he replied, “Naniniwala naman po ako sa Diyos.“ Her tears flowed and all she could do was hug the patient’s mother. Fortunate to have carried some money with her, she handed it over. “Ma’am, malaking tulong po ito, single mother po ako.”

Oftentimes we limit ourselves thinking that we are incapable of giving, or abandon the idea of sharing, thinking that it would be too small of a contribution. Everyone is in need of attention, affection, and reaffirmation. If you have been remiss lately or engrossed with yourself and your concerns, try lending an ear, paying a visit, or giving a call to make someone feel remembered or appreciated. People, especially those getting on in years, derive joy from such simple gestures. Extend yourself beyond the family circle and be that person who inspires others to be kind and to care enough to share themselves. To be indifferent should never be anyone’s option.

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