Untie social media
How many of us still get appeased when someone uses the word sorry? Two friends shared that it still has a strong impact if sincerely meant, and followed through with measures reflective of rectifying the situation, and is still better than not receiving any.
In the past week, you may have probably watched or read about the public apology that Mark Zuckerberg was forced to make during a US Senate inquiry on social media platforms and its far-reaching influence on child safety. Skipping on whether he was genuinely sorry or dwelling on the manner of how the proceedings were conducted, as such an analysis would deviate from the issue on hand, what transpired should serve as an opportunity for self-reflection. We are all, in one way or another, accountable, as we may have failed to define limits or taken needed action when it was possible to do so.
Use social media responsibly. How exactly? The American Academy of Pediatrics provides some tips based on how parents can help children develop healthy digital habits. While not all-encompassing, it provides a framework to bring about needed change. One such tip is to formulate a media plan to help balance the time between the use or nonuse of devices. For those who are inclined, try visiting the website for a quick tutorial. To be more relatable, I included some real stories to further illustrate.
To begin, in setting down rules, make sure you are a credible role model. Start by monitoring your own use and talk openly to your children about how social media can be both beneficial and harmful to the whole family and that there is a need to stay vigilant.
“Dinner time is the only chance that we can get together. To ensure that we do not have unwanted distractions, every member of the family is required to drop their phones into the bowl provided for at the entrance of our home.” While this may sound rigid for some, it is an example of how one can turn an ordinary activity into an opportunity, wherein both adults and children can be screen-free and present in the moment. Get creative and look for similar ways wherein you can spend more time together, engaging in pursuits that cultivate and enrich your relationships with one another, liberated from the influence of gadgets. They will always be the best memories to be cherished. Keep making them.
“I am sorry but I have to excuse myself. Thank you for joining us for dinner. It’s my son’s bedtime and he always looks forward to either me or his dad reading to him.” It is a fact that young children thrive on having a routine. Take time to capture those impressionable years when you still have the luxury. While devices filled with educational material may complement as learning tools, limit their use. It can never be a surrogate for the warmth and undivided attention of a parent.
“You know your mom is a dinosaur, could you please teach me how to use my phone and computer and to download needed applications?” Such an admission not only acknowledges limitations but also your acceptance of the need to learn to live in their world by making it a shared experience. Furthermore, asking for help is one way to increase their self-confidence, leave enough room to have a conversation on the subject, and enable some form of parental control. While avoidance of total exposure may be the best way to go for the very young, this is an impossibility for those who are older. As the adults in the relationship, we must help them understand and responsibly navigate through the wealth of information that they are bombarded with, recognize inappropriate materials, and encourage them to come to you in such instances so you can have a healthy and meaningful discussion about it.
“It is best to leave your gadgets in another room.” Unplug. The lights from devices can keep one awake and more often than not lead to mindless scrolling, depriving you of that much-needed sleep. Getting enough rest does wonders. You wake up with a clear head and a chance to meet the day’s challenges energized. Some may reason that its use is their way to relax and de-stress. One way to go around this is to set rules and make sure that these are strictly followed. A nephew shared that his 5-year-old is only given two hours of screen time every weekend and his son is totally fine with this. Start them early.
While advances in technology continuously play a major role in the path to progress, let us also remember the danger of unforeseen and collateral damages, which unfortunately would be difficult to simply delete.
