Love as a command

In my line of work, I get a sick feeling at the pit of my stomach whenever love is used as a command or an obligation. It never bodes well. Not for self-worth and not for relationships. And so, when the Department of Tourism (DOT) launched their new slogan “Love the Philippines,” I had mixed feelings about it. I reserved my judgment, knowing that slogans are living and dynamic ideas. I wasn’t initially enthralled with “It’s More Fun in the Philippines” either but its eventual memeification—a Filipino forte—made it at least entertaining. I was curious how Filipinos would take to the new slogan and, more importantly, how it will be positioned by DOT.

Lo and behold, it was worse than we thought, as it was discovered that DOT’s released video included stock footage of non-Philippine scenery. To add more blunder, the video was supposedly just a “mood” video, a creative pitch only meant for internal stakeholders, but was somehow released by DOT as a final product. They fired the creative agency, DDB Group Philippines, and Cebu officials were quick to rally around DOT Secretary Christina Garcia Frasco, decrying that she was merely sabotaged. What about this exemplifies loving the Philippines?

Love is a complex phenomenon studied by philosophers and social scientists for centuries. It is not something we merely feel, otherwise we would be happy enough to experience love quietly. Love is both emotion and action. In some ways, it is more helpful to see it as an emotion-driven action or behavior. We commit to someone because we love them. We respect them because we love them. We willingly sacrifice because of love.

Not all love actions are necessarily altruistic or healthy, especially when mixed with jealousy or greed. We make demands of others because of love. The most common love-based demand is to be loved in return. Thus Erich Fromm, a prominent psychological thinker, valued the act of loving as opposed to being loved. Instead of preoccupying ourselves with laments of not receiving love, it is much wiser to focus on the art and skill of loving. In relationship work, for example, aside from what they need from their partners, I ask clients what kind of partners they would like to be.

With the controversial DOT slogan, some have suggested adding a comma, turning “love” as something offered by the Philippines instead of something demanded. In what way has the Philippines shown its love? By extension, in what way has the government shown its love for both country and its constituents?

In an ironic way, the process of developing their tourism campaign does not reflect a loving attitude toward our country. If they did, they would have been excited to show its local wonders rather than recklessly choosing foreign stock footage. Even as a mood video, the fact that the pitch was generic enough to be interchangeable with foreign landscapes shows a lack of love for the uniqueness of the Philippines. Even the innocent possibility that DOT mistook a pitch as a final product and posted it publicly meant that they themselves can’t distinguish Filipino scenery, a prospect so absurd for tourism professionals.

How they are handling the faux pas does not also show loving behavior. They have been quick to scapegoat DDB Group Philippines instead of recognizing that this was a collaborative mistake. Instead of the government acknowledging that an expensive global tourism campaign requires utmost sincerity and seriousness among its proponents, they were quick to pass the buck.

I wouldn’t be surprised if they will eventually blame Filipino netizens for ruining the country’s reputation by publicly decrying the campaign, as they have done so whenever the international community is kept abreast of legitimate criticism of Philippine government. “If you love your country, you wouldn’t complain.” Isn’t this how we silence critics and the opposition and even villainize activism?

This is why I find love as a command very troubling and dangerous. Love doesn’t mean silence or total subservience. A loving act is something that helps nurture and grow the object of our love. When love is mutual, we both grow. If love is only in one direction, helping others will still help ourselves grow as more loving persons. What is not a loving act is something that hinders our loved one’s growth. When we enable their destructive behaviors, that is not loving. In this way, to love our country means to wish for its growth. We love our country and that is why we push for things to be better. For the government to do better. We push for accountability because we love our country.

In what way do you love your country?

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