The women vs women narrative

Last week, the United Nations Development Programme (UNDP) announced the results of its global study on gender. It found that 99.5 percent of Filipinos hold biases against women. This means that majority of men and women in the country subscribe to negative stereotypes that perpetuate gender-based discrimination against women. These biases show up everywhere — from who we elect as leaders, how much women are paid compared to men, and how much of the country’s unpaid labor is shouldered by women.

What is even more alarming is that Filipino women (99.67 percent) actually tend to be slightly more biased against their fellow women compared to Filipino men (99.5 percent). My friend who shared the news with me had a very sobering thought: “Given the incredibly high percentage, it is likely that these numbers also include supposed women empowerment advocates like us.”

Outside our awareness, our brains are constantly scanning our environment for signs and patterns. Stored in our unconscious, these ideas influence the way we define the world and form the implicit biases that shape our perspectives and decision-making. So long as negative sentiments about women are deeply ingrained in societal norms, these will infiltrate people’s unconscious and lead to discriminatory thinking and behavior.

Far from being immune, women are just as likely to absorb these narratives and turn against their own gender. According to the University of Kansas Women’s Center, internalized misogyny is “when women subconsciously project sexist ideas onto other women and even onto themselves.” We could be proudly talking about our passion for empowerment and gender equality on a conscious level, without realizing that we are unconsciously adhering to prejudiced beliefs against women.

This could start at a very young age. In a TED Talk, Antonina Stępak spoke about the “Not like other girls” mentality. This is when young women actively try to distance and set themselves apart from their female peers by rejecting feminine-associated qualities and interests, and only liking traditionally male-associated interests. This phenomenon could be stemming from two harmful notions: That one, to be feminine is to be inferior; and second, a woman’s worth is largely dependent on how desirable and interesting she is to men.

The insidious and overt nature of modern-day sexism makes it all too easy to be rationalized away. For example, the first instinct for some is to question the UNDP study’s accuracy. After all, this country has had two female presidents, and many other prominent women in C-suite positions. What we don’t often realize is that these also serve as the perfect camouflage for deep-seated biases that continue to exist. The path to leadership roles is still largely based on an outdated model that prioritizes a masculine brand of leadership. Perhaps the hype over the small victories we’ve had in the past has also led us to be complacent and complicit.

Not all hope is lost. Now that we are aware of our tendency to be biased, we could also be more proactive in deepening that self-awareness. Adopting a more reflective mindset and seeking out educational resources about the topic could help us better understand, and unlearn, how we have been conditioned to think certain sexist norms are okay. Another helpful step is to take some of the free Implicit Association Tests, available on implicit.harvard.edu, which enable individuals to identify their unconscious biases.

It is worth noting that the Philippines is one of the few countries where International Women’s Day — traditionally commemorated by most countries for just one day (March 8) — has evolved into a month-long celebration of women. As much as I appreciate how these events help grow the conversation, they can also attract tokenistic support rather than create actual impact. Instead of just having one well-intentioned program in March, organizations should strive to implement more consistent and meaningful initiatives throughout the year. Some best practices include antibias education programs for employees and assertiveness training workshops for young women.

Lastly, living in an age of participatory media gives all of us the power to create and amplify better narratives about women. We can address sexist norms and expectations that are found in everyday conversations, and push for more female representation.

Though it will not happen overnight, here’s to hoping our collective efforts will help overturn some of these damaging biases during our lifetime.

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