Homosexuality is not a choice | Inquirer Opinion

Homosexuality is not a choice

05:02 AM August 27, 2019

I both cringe at and feel annoyed with some people’s belief that one’s homosexuality is a choice, or a result of having been influenced by another homosexual, or caused by a lack of faith in God.

Here’s why I, as a homosexual, disagree with any of those notions.


I grew up in a Catholic household surrounded by a fair amount of straight men and straight women of varying ages, and spent an equal amount of time with both genders.

I was the only gay kid (was unaware at the time that I was) for some years in elementary school, and had only straight male and female friends. I even spent most of my time with the guys doing the usual “boy stuff” back then.


The majority of my childhood relatives and friends with whom I spent a lot of time were boys. And among my relatives, there were only a few female contemporaries of mine with whom I mingled.

Yet, here I am, a homosexual for as long as I can remember. Growing up, I was never attracted to women. For a time, I pretended to be. But I really developed an attraction to men early on.

I’ve been a regular Sunday churchgoer ever since I was a child and even studied in a Catholic school. In my childhood, I was exposed only to straight couple movies and books and was not aware of the idea of homosexuality.

Also, no relative influenced me to become gay, because as far as I know, I am the only gay person from either side of my family.

My point is that no one in my life ever told me that I should be attracted to men or women, so my sexual orientation is not a choice.

It is also not a case of having been influenced by somebody else, because I never saw a same-sex couple when I was younger. Same-sex couples were not (yet) showcased very much (if at all) in the media in the early 2000s.

Lastly, I go to church regularly and believe in God, so me being gay did not stem from a lack of faith.


Being a homosexual is something one would really feel within himself/herself, usually at an early point in his/her life. This is something most straight people will never understand.


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