This thing called QLC

A friend told me that quarter-life crisis is a myth created especially by young professionals to describe their absence of focus in achieving their goals — or lack of them. He meant that it’s all in the mind. For him, one can actually skip having to experience it when one has clearer goals. I respected that stance, but I simply begged to disagree.

QLC, according to many psychology books, is a prime period of life where people in their 20s and early 30s feel doubtful about their lives as a product of adulting. Baby boomers would call it a “millennial thingy,” driven by feelings of uncertainty, of discontent, of being overwhelmed. To a certain degree, there might be some truth to that, but I’d like to emphasize that there’s more to being a millennial in dealing with quarter-life crisis than you think.

In fact, experts believe that there’s a prelude to that. They call it a postgraduate depression. Graduation season is over and many are at the crossroads. The transition from the comforts of the school to the larger arena of the professional world can be difficult to process. What is supposed to be an exciting chapter for some becomes a blurred pair of lenses for others. Many struggle with it so much that it gets serious and real.

The feeling hibernates when one gets a job, but it creeps up in between every milestone, making us wonder whether we’re doing the right thing or if we’re at the right place to begin with. The “millennial” factor comes in when one starts to compare his or her life with others, influenced by what they see through the different platforms in their gadgets. We cannot deny the fact that the age of technology has greatly contributed to how people feel with their lives. Research shows that people who are frequently engaged in social media have raised their insecurity and depression level.

At the end of the day, one has to understand that each of us has different realities to deal with — realities that play a vital role in our decisions in life. These realities — considering our family’s state and condition, the probability of making it big in the industry, escaping the pressures and expectations posed by people around us, etc. — are only few of the things that can hinder, stop, or delay us from achieving our personal goals. Our confusion may also be caused by a sudden realization and experience or an unforeseen incident in one’s life that can change the course of everything. But that doesn’t mean we cease our journey there.

I’ve realized that maybe, we may have also overused the idea that QLC is a normal stage to experience, and failed to remember that it needs to be overcome. Thus, many fall into the trap. Lucky are those who didn’t have to undergo this phase. As for those who did, I admire you for surviving. QLC is no laughing matter, especially for those who had it the hard way. We need to let them know there is always a way out.

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Mary Pauline Balmes, 25, is a graduate student of De La Salle University and “a strong advocate of mental health.”